My May

I’ve decided to start posting photos of my month as a nice way to remember what I’ve done. I didn’t take many photos this month though, so they’re mainly of food. This is the part where you’re meant to feign surprise.

First of all, I spent way too much time on public transport this month. Hopefully with the semester winding down, things will calm down a bit. I love views like this though when the sun is shining and you know you’ve got a great day ahead (this day involved two 21sts and seeing close friends for the first time in ages).

Also honourable mention to the first day of the month, when I interned all day and then went to a friend’s place for fish and chips and watched Collingwood slaughter Carlton with her family. We followed it up with chocolate fondants made by her sister and watching If You are the One online.

The Penny Black, 420 Sydney Rd, Brunswick

I’m not sure about June but for the past 2 months, The Penny has been having $2 pizza Monday-Friday from 12-5pm. Very cheap post-uni feed with some high school friends. Sure they’re not particularly fancy but they’ve got some neat combinations. The ‘Crazy Rhythms’ with walnuts and honey and ‘London Calling’ with potato, caramelised onions and sour cream were my particular faves.

 
Poynton’s Boulevard Cafe, Cnr Vida Street & The Boulevard, Essendon

I’ve been going to this place for years. It’s a nursery on the Maribyrnong River with a nice cafe overlooking the nursery and surrounds. Their walnut and cinnamon banana bread ($6.90) is something that I dream about, with its side of cream and maple syrup. I’ve tried different desserts but I keep coming back to this one.

Carte Crepes, University of Melbourne, Parkville

Carte Crepes is the place to go on campus when you want to treat yourself. In this case, my friend and I survived a rather testing subject and I decided to grab myself a Nutella and marshmallow crepe. Amazing.

Top Paddock, 658 Church St, Richmond 

But of course, I couldn’t leave the celebrations at that. My best friend and I had a well-needed catch up at Top Paddock. It’s a little bit fancy but I really liked my poached eggs with broccolini, sugar snaps and avocado ($18.50). We sat outside with portable heaters next to us and it was so cosy.

So, there’s my May! How would you characterise your month?

Four Things You Probably* Shouldn’t Say to Someone Grieving

*from my personal experience. Obviously everyone deals with things differently and maybe some readers will find this list a little touchy or over the top, but this is my perspective.

I know myself that sometimes it can be difficult to find the right words and, of course, 99% of the time aren’t said out of malice. But I think it makes it a little easier for everyone when you gain a different viewpoint.

1) OK so this one technically isn’t grieving but when I found out that there was only a matter of days, sometimes I would explain the situation to people when I was looking a little down or couldn’t come to events. The response, on a number of occasions, was (both in person and over the internet) ‘oh I’m sorry to hear that, hope he gets better soon :)’… clearly not understanding that that was the whole point – he wasn’t going to get better.

2) If the person that someone is grieving was old at the time of their passing, there’s a fine line between comforting someone with reminding them of all the good times they got to have…. and insinuating that they should get over it because ‘they were old anyway’. Hang on, scratch that. It’s not a fine line at all, you’ll know when you’ve crossed it.

3) This one depends on the kind of relationship you have but if you’re at least a little close to someone, don’t tell them ‘I’m going to give you some space’ and then not contact them for three months. Again, it’s not really a fine line and usually people don’t mind a check-in like ‘hey, hope you’re okay, if you need anything I’m here’.

4) Finally, if you do find that you haven’t heard from them for awhile, don’t message them condescendingly asking why they haven’t spoken to you. This is all about tone and there’s a huge difference between someone saying ‘hey I haven’t heard from you for awhile, hope you’ve been okay’ and ‘why haven’t you messaged me?’.

Tl;dr – Go with the flow and your instinct. Be there for the ones you love, that’s the best thing you can do.